My Story

By Katie

Hello, my name is Katie and I am 30 years old. My journey through the adoption process began just a few days after my 27th birthday when I found out that I was pregnant. I already had 3 children under the age of four and I was recently divorced, unemployed, and living with my parents. This pregnancy was not planned and I was so scared and overwhelmed with trying to figure out how I could support another baby. I had so many emotions and fears going through my mind and I am so ashamed to admit this but the first thought I had was to have an abortion. This seemed like the solution to all of “my problems”. If I had an abortion I could hide the shame of being pregnant as well as not having to deal with how I would support another child. I sat down with a phone book ready to call abortion clinics and get some prices. I made the first phone call and I wrote down the amount that they quoted to me. I hung up the phone and I looked at the amount that I had written down and it hit me like a ton of bricks that I was looking at what they thought my child was worth. I instantly felt sick to my stomach and I knew that I could never do that to my baby. I threw away the paper and I began to pray. I told God I was sorry for getting myself into this situation and I needed His wisdom and strength to show me what to do.

There was a woman that my aunt goes to church with that gave me the name of Generations Adoptions. I did not call right away but eventually I did pick up the phone and I called them. I was put in contact with my caseworker, Jackie. She came and took me to lunch one day and we talked about where I was in my life and where I wanted to be at in my life. I thought that if I said I wanted to place my child for adoption that people would automatically judge me and say I was a “bad mom” for not wanting my child. To my surprise Jackie understood what I was saying and she told me what an incredible gift I could give to a family that was unable to have children. It had never occurred to me that God might want to use me to help another family in a way I never dreamed possible. After our first meeting I knew in my heart that God was leading me to place my child for adoption.

The facts of my situation were that I could not support my child and that I had a responsibility to my baby to protect him and give him the best possible life that I could, even if that meant he did not live with me. Jackie took time to explain to me that I could still keep in contact with my child if I placed him for adoption. She told me I could receive pictures and correspondence from the adoptive family so that I could have peace of mind knowing he was being taken care of and loved. Jackie became more than just my caseworker, she became my friend. She accompanied me to all of my doctor’s appointments and we had wonderful conversations over lunch. When the time came for a family to be chosen for my child I wanted to choose them myself. I had no idea how I would be able to choose a family because I wished I could help them all. When I sat down to read all of the different profiles, I had decided before I even arrived that day that I wanted to find a family that I thought I would like to grow up with and live with. I carefully read all of the profiles and I found the family that I felt like I had the most common interest with and the family that I could see myself feeling comfortable with. I told Jackie which one I had chosen and she set up a dinner for all of us to meet in person. I was so nervous to meet them, I wondered if they would like me.

Jackie and I arrived at the restaurant together and I met Rob and Kim for the first time. They hugged me and we all sat down to eat. They brought me a scrap book which introduced me to their families. It had pictures of Rob and Kim, their parents and their siblings and nieces and nephews! It was the most amazing and thoughtful gift I ever could have received. I took the scrap book home and I studied each and every picture telling my baby all about his parents, his grandparents, his aunts and uncles! Shortly after our first meeting we all met at the hospital for the delivery. Kim came with me into the delivery room. When our baby boy arrived both Kim and I cried as we welcomed this precious child into the world. Rob and Kim named their son Tyler and we spent the next few days in the hospital together getting to know one another. We laughed and really bonded with one another. Then as I was released from the hospital I was overwhelmed with so many emotions and I wondered if I had made the right choice. The next few days were hard and I cried innumerable tears. But in my heart I never second guessed the family I had chosen for Tyler.

I then started to get my life headed in the direction that I wanted to go in. Each day I kept taking steps forward and at first it seemed to move so slowly, but with each passing day I became closer and closer to my personal goals. I was able to move to the city I wanted to raise my children in and I was blessed with a job that enabled me to support my family. About one year after I had Tyler I purchased my first home for my children and I. Shortly after buying our first home I met my husband and we got married. I have come such a long way from where I was when I found out I was pregnant with Tyler. I am still in contact with Rob and Kim and they send me pictures of Tyler and keep me up to date on how he is and what he is doing. I love them and I am so happy about the decision I made to place Tyler in his family. He is safe, loved and taken care of and I am at complete peace with every choice I made for him. I put Tyler’s best interest before myself and we are all right where we need to be.

I also wanted to share how this has affected my other three children. I sat them all down and told them about Tyler and I explained to them that God wanted to use us to help a family that would not be able to have children without our help. I told them that we got to share our baby brother with Rob and Kim. They were thrilled to be apart of something so important! We have pictures of their brother, Tyler, up at our home and we pray together for Tyler. They want to be able to meet Tyler again someday and they love that they have another brother. This entire process of adoption has been a blessing to everyone involved and I am so grateful to have been able to be a part of this! I have no regrets about my decision and I take every chance I am given to talk about it and share how great this has been for us.

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